All, this week's Wordy Old Men on Downton Abbey is going to have to be put off 'til next week as Wordy's pricey laptop issues and my sickness and likely death from my head exploding next time I sneeze has gotten in the way. So here is a peace offering. Another oldie but goodie (and this one is slightly touched up). This one originally appeared back on March 29, 2009 and ended up leading to none other than Keith Coogan visiting the comments section with a great snippet about himself and a certain look-alike.
1986 was a better time in American history. I high point, really. ALF premiered. The Burt Reynolds Heat--you know, the good one that that hack piece of shit Brian De Palma is going to ruin but at least it will have some Statham in it--came out. The two best movies ever, Highlander and Howard the Duck, both were released that year. And of course, Out of Bounds was released. You may be asking yourself, "Wait, what the fuck is Out of Bounds? Am I this far out of the loop?" Yes, you are. Get your shit together.
Basically, if you are looking for the perfect marriage of the Youth in Revolt and Wrong Man genres, then the 1986 Anthony Michael Hall star vehicle Out of Bounds is your fucking movie. Yes, that's right, 1986 was a time in which Anthony Michael Hall was getting star vehicles. Shit was just better then.
The Big Lebowski) after his home breaks. When they land at the airport, he and his brother grab the wrong duffel bag (no, there are not eight heads in it).
Of course, it happens to be full of drugs, and this sets Daedalus from "Kindred: The Embraced" on a murderous rampage that seems to the authorities (whose efforts are led by Mayor Royce, Glynn Turman) to be the work of the Daryl. Honestly, Jeff Kober is one creepy looking hombre and this casting decision works. Think a scarier version of Robert Davi or Andrew Divoff, or if you're a Heat fan like me (yes, the aforementioned good one), a young Henry Silva, and you've got your villain.
Perhaps the most awesome aspect of this film--and trust me, there are plenty--is how dead all the dead people look. They don't just look like they were freshly killed. No, it would be a damn shame if you confused that body with a live person. No, these corpses look like zombies mere hours after they've been offed.
Of the myriad other badass aspects of this film, Jerry Levine (the sleazy Keith Coogan) makes an appearance, which is really cool, but pretty much as soon as he appears you know somehow Kober is going to kill Stiles, and no one wants Stiles dead. I know who you're going to ask next, and no, he's not wearing the "What Are You Looking At Dicknose" shirt.
Also, there's a performance in the film by Siouxsie and the Banshees, Dewey Cox's dad/Arlo Givens plays a crooked DEA agent, a Meat Loaf appearance (acting, not performing), and sweet fucking Night Ranger song, "Wild and Innocent Youth". Unfortunately, this is the best video I can find for it:
I know it's not easy to find. From what I can tell, it never got released on DVD, but it is on Amazon Instant Video. Your life will be improved in every way for having seen the world at its apex, with AMH as a star. I know you like this place, but what the fuck are you still doing here? Get watching.