I'd just like to thank everyone for making me President of the Internet. Your votes and well wishes on the campaign trail were much appreciated. My old lady thanks you all as well. We both thank the Hendersons of Osawatomie, KS, for the seemingly endless supply of kolaches you plied us with, and the MacLeans of Post Falls, ID, for that great smoked pork shoulder you invited us to sup on.
As for my opponent, Phil, if you come near my residence or my kinfolk again, I will not hesitate to finish you. I'm dead serious. Don't test me. You don't want to know what I'm capable of little man.